Why music?              Why now?   

          About 7 years ago we adopted our son who had just turned 10 years old. The combination of his reactions to the trauma he had lived through as well as destructive coping skills he had learned served as a catalyst that brought my own childhood trauma to the forefront of my life. 

        You see, as a 3 year old child, I had been in an explosion with my parents that sent me to a hospital where I was separated from them for 7 weeks as we recovered. In time, my physical wounds healed, but unfortunately because of my young age, the emotional wounds were never properly addressed & healed & so I too, had learned a lot of unhealthy coping skills. But as I grew into an adult, I had no conscious concept of what was lying just under the surface.  I had learned to put on the happy face, act like things were perfect and just stuff all feelings that were not pleasant. 

        As I desperately tried to help our son adapt to this new life, I found myself quickly sinking deep into a pit of despair, anxiety, fear and eventually depression as we continually triggered each other, catapulting both of us towards more & more unhealthy & traumatizing experiences. I was in a bad place, alone & full of fear that I recognized was often irrational, but without the tools to fight it off. 

         So I turned to music as my lifeline.  There was one album by Lauren Daigle and several other songs that got me through this time. I listened to them over and over and I declared to myself that even though I could not feel the truth that was in these songs, I was choosing to believe they were true. And I decided I would continue to declare these truths over my life until and even after I could feel them.  Truths about God & my relationship with him & the hope that I have in Him. The only thing I could feel most of the time was despair & fear but I chose hope even when I didn’t feel it.  

       I also opened myself up to a few close friends in a way I never had in my whole life. I chose to be vulnerable & truthful even when it was ugly & messy & embarrassing & I asked for help. And wouldn’t you know it, my exposing myself & being honest with them actually drew them closer instead of driving them away. I was terrified that if people knew the truth about me they wouldn’t like me.  But I have found the opposite is true. The more real you are with most people, the more real they will be with you.  

       In addition, I got help from professionals.  I went to counseling & read more books than you can imagine on a whole variety of topics so that I could understand what was happening inside me as well as my son & the rest of my family.  I’ve tried to learn to listen first, then respond with compassion instead of reacting.  I still fail a good bit of the time, but there’s been definite improvement. 

        So the long answer as to why I have made this music now? Because I have hope again. And this hope gives me purpose.   Because I want to give to others the hope & help that music gave me.  I know the healing power the combination of words & tunes can be.

                    Words matter & when we marry them to music,

                               they entwine with our souls & become part of who we are.

        The other reason I have made this music... because God gave it to me in many miraculous ways & made it clear that I was to share it with others. I  wasn't trying to become a song writer. But because I had immersed myself in worship music for years, and one of the main gifts I have practiced for decades is playing piano & singing, it flowed out of  the times where I leaned in & listened to what was whispered into my soul. 

         Slowing down to listen is a skill I'm not naturally good at, but I have practiced it lately and these songs are a result.  Each song is a little miracle and a gift to me from a God who delights in giving good gifts.  My natural tendency is to hold what is precious close to me. But as the title of this song indicates, this whole season of my life has been to surrender- to let go.  I invite you on this journey with me to let go of the things that are controlling you & surrender to the One who knows you intimately & wants to breath new life into you. 

      I believe the songs that we plant in our minds & hearts will grow & bear fruit.  If we fill ourselves with good, true & uplifting music, we will have a plentiful harvest.  

          Here are the seeds. 

                   I’m giving them to you to plant in your hearts. 

                         Listen to these songs & be filled with truth.  

                                      May the fruit be evident in your life

What is Rose Music? 

          Roses are one of my favorite flowers. I have an assortment of rosebushes growing around our property.  They  are beautiful  & I find the layers of petals that add depth to their beauty inspiring. The variety of colors they come in are breathtaking & they bloom multiple times throughout the summer for extended enjoyment. 

        But within that beauty there is potential for pain. I can't count the number of times I have bled because of an encounter with the thorns on one of my rosebushes. This usually happens when I'm either pruning the bush or cutting a flower to enjoy in the house. 

      Does that mean I rid our flowerbeds of rosebushes? Certainly not! 

                         I know that with good comes the potential for bad. 

                                       Beauty often holds sorrow.

                                                   Joy often blooms out of heartache.

        In a similar way, my music has been born out of much sorrow.  Yet rather than bitterness, I chose to see the beauty that would not have existed if not for the pain.

             Thorns are part of the plant to help them, not to hurt them.

                           Yet we often think there is no purpose in our pain. 

         I very clearly see the purpose in my pain has been to make me a more compassionate person who understands myself, God & others with much more clarity now. 

               I challenge you to see your joy & pain as not in opposition to each other, but as part of each other & to find purpose in them. 

 So I felt the name Rose Music was a fitting title for myself & my family who have helped me to bring this music to life.  

Rose Music is made up of  Rebecca Martin (piano & vocals), Thaddeus Martin (vocals), Kaiden Martin (vocals & cajon), & Todd Martin (vocals & photography).